why?

I am a fucking cunt.... Yep I said it I am a pathetic selfish cunt. I would like to say that it the beautiful side of BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) but the truth is it just me. I have this incredible gift of just fucking everything up. See the thing is i dont know or understand what happiness or what it feels like to actually be loved. Now to be clear ive had relationships, believed i was in love but looking at it through therapy and with the right people , it was not love I felt. I loved the idea of it, I loved the idea and structure that love and relationships created.

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